Stop now…you can’t win On top of it the father sleeping with someone else makes it exponentially worse. They are wonderful gifts to a man and god I miss them. Do I need to contact the services on his behalf? With regard to your comment “I don’t believe it is up to others to decide who wishes to commit suicide or not…”. It’s some how easier..yes it always feels like there is something missing but when you lose your heart and your soul entirely, you lose your reason for existing..So feeling completely empty is easier to deal with then the reality of going insane from the pain that caused the emptiness to begin with. Shame, I feel nothing but shame. Will, I appreciate that you understand my point of view that many people have the erroneous idea that it is an entirely selfish act on the part of the sufferer to want to take their own life, however, I did not write my opinion to support any of your own ideologies, nor did I write it to help you tear down another person or their belief system(s). So instead of on extreme like( suicide) I start to go the other way and destroy everything around me. If you would like to talk to me personally feel free to email me @ will.nist@yahoo.com. Buy Dead Inside Depression Emo Pastel Goth T-Shirt: Shop top fashion brands T-Shirts at Amazon.com FREE DELIVERY and Returns possible on eligible purchases the atmosphere ? Others may be had at a great discount by contacting the manufacturer as they have plans that greatly reduce the costs as well if brand name medications are needed. I slept almost 3 days straight, I only remember getting up twice to go to the bathroom. Hi, Will…Thanks so much for your advice! 4 J'y vaisPatrick Fiori. Some days things of joy and brilliance hurt to even be around. I have had these moments of feelings that I shouldn’t of lived past my age. I did not believe in medications and I still dont, but just as an experiment I took a very mild anti anxiety pill. For a while I was in this dead state with a feeling of tightness inside. I hope you meet someone who will turn everything around for you someday, and that you can be happy with her. So all the friends in this blog…I am sharing my experience..u may or may not agree as per ur choice but I would like to request plz try. The site is run out of Boston, MA and the members span the globe. There are scads of facts available to be read, re: a supreme being. my mom and step dad were alcoholics. I am lucky with my access to good medical care. Especially when you have no pressing need to act on anything. Without love life is worthless. When I die no one will know these thoughts other than those who also will never be heard. Trying to find my “hope”. Can’t say though that it is good or something either. Which he was and I tried to illegally obtain the chemo drugs from India that were scarce even in the US. As to being sarcastic I don’t remember being that although I guess I may have been. Just take one day at a time. it sucks. It literally feels like your insides are growing like your heart is growing inside you..its creepy and nerve wrecking because there’s always that constant fear of being hurt so bad again and knowing you won’t be able to live through another tragedy..i have felt entirely empty for 6 years and it physically hurt to try and force a smile out…I just started feeling emotion for the first time in six years and honestly I’d rather go back to not feeling a damn thing.. For a while now, I feel so emotionally low and dead that I felt distant towards everyone and everything. It’s so hard not to feel this way, I keep hoping one day it will change. I dont feel alright. hey guys am glad i found this place reading how u guys feel make me think am not alone in this ever since puberty i felt like i was empty hollow inside over the year ive seem to become more detached from myself and now i just carnt seem to cope with it any more its just so hard i fell like the emptyness is overwelming me i find espressing my emotiocns is to unbrarable when walking down the street if feels like am the only one there and no one can even see me and the overwelming feeling off nothingness it starting to make me thing the only way for it to end is to kill myself the think that stop e in the pass was family and friends and how it would make them feel but is it fare i have to keep going though this feeling all the time just to make others happy i just dont know how to deal with it anymore i just want it to end .. Yes, you are quite right I have regular access to the internet. I put my interest first now and love me. I don’t know i do i cope up with it. Hey there , im hemal from India , since of 1 and a half gear I’m feeling like depressed , anxiety, loneliness, suicidal thoughts , mostly No hope to live on this earth . They say that life flashes before your eyes when something like that happens, I got a void, no emotion, no will to survive, no fear, no nothing. Another William from Pennsylvania. I’m 18, yet it feels like I’m just a 90 year old in a young girl’s body. Feeling their absence is like feeling the absence of oxygen from the lungs. My sons are 30 and 29 years old. Sadly in me it just causes paranoia. Pets dying. This is a rhetorical question, so there is really nothing left for you to respond to. My family has visited him repeatedly and I haven’t yet. why does life have to feel like this? Tricky new seek-and-find tests bad weather safety... Elegance coach reveals the clothes that make you look 'common' and turn off 'classy' men - including... How to land your dream job amid the pandemic: Recruitment expert reveals why you should sell your lockdown... What are the chances! This as you might know is usually a control problem. I feel so hurt all the time. And it sad that the first time I had to defend myself physically had to be with my kids father. I do desire to pick myself up off the ground. my upbringing, along with my emotional issues really had an effect on my childhood. But the consequences of the mania are unfulfilled ideas, projects, hooking up with people that are truly unsuitable. You do not have to have Personalities Manifest to have them. Take the drugs the doctors – even if they are idiots – prescribe to you? I don’t think you can. Needless to say we separated. I can’t tell you how I hate the emptiness. So my advice is be patient, and live healthy. Real kindness and love from a partner is about the best thing there is for someone with depression. I could go on forever…. I know his feelings are still there under all the crap that life has seemed to dump on him, no matter how he denies it. I have no idea what set me off to this degree. Illness lies to you. His gods opinion is the same as his. 8/dez/2019 - ༄ J’AI FAIM ♥~( ‿ ) encontrou este Pin. My job sucks. Noté /5. A few beers or the like with me can usually work for a short while. said goodbye without his reason and to this day, I still haven’t heard from him. May I say you are not worthless. I try to convince myself every day that suicide is not an option, but unfortunately, it is, and will always continue to be. How people like these make it well into adulthood with such magical beliefs will always amaze me. You can tell them how bad it hurts but until they’ve experienced it themselves it remains indescribable. I know shes using me and cheating on me constantly she doesnt even bother to explain or admit it when caught red handed she simply offers a ridiculous explanation thats so far fetched its insane and expects me to believe it. They may ruin your chances for employment. Pushing people away and finding new ways to ignore morals and decency. Well, because I tried to kill myself three time but somehow someone always shows up in the nick of time, it’s like being on this roller coasters that you never wanted to be on but you can’t get off. I feel severe depression these days (after breaking up with my viancee ) Marlene, The abuse in those 5 years did everything. I thought it’s me alone whos is suffering,I need a break in life too,im broken,dead and I just wanna let go but I keep thinking of my daughter everyday n realise it will kill her forever.I need help somebody help me. You should know that mandatory reporting is a legal requirement of many professions who deal with people in the social, health, education etc sectors. Your support of censorship is to go after those who openly discuss there problems and attack them. that’s how they tried to make everything better, but it never worked and I guess they were too gone in their minds to ever learn from their experiences that it wasn’t helping. This is my Life! It’s ugly, offensive, mean and hurtful to believers. I’m constantly drained and feeling malnourished but I have 0 appetite and food tastes like shit. I’ve been married for 17 years, have 4 beautiful children, pretty successful in the hospitality industry, yet I’ve always had some depression issues. Me too. If he can’t just wait until he is ready. Try courtesy or kindness. Maybe mommy beat you? My family would be better off if I used a bullet. I’m not able to express anything not to me also. I fell in Love with this beautiful teacher. I cannot hurt my husband but I am destroying him like this.. If so I apologise on behalf of myself for the misery you are reading!!! I hope you understand the pt. He ran out of medication about 2 weeks ago, and doesn’t have insurance to go to the doctor to get more, as he is in a fairly new job. Hey Rose, thanks for this excellent suggestion. You can find the term used in the bible. But i know, i am deep lonely from inside.Please tell me what should i do? You may not feel very comfortable telling people how your loved one died (and that’s usually because of the stigma that sill remains within our culture). In Germany where these speakers are banned rumors are beginning to dominate the younger generations as no real debate is allowed. Since you have such opinions and feel it’s so openly OK to abuse others. Will most definitely make things any better. your blogs are honest and open and i so wish my lover and friend knew of your blogs. Kyle can I say u something..ppl get killed in accidents without saying a goodbye..even if we are walking dead atleast we know gonna be dead…then y not make each n every day as if we have to go to war to do better for someone so u r into some army camp pulling all ur strength..Kyle yes walking dead is dead now we are soldiers..soldiers for others…n if u all ok there’s no health issue that may sound deadly…I think u r d most lucky person..ppl die of diseases, Coz sometimes they are helpless due to stage or money..But have u seen ppl on Facebook literally before their death they helped in donations…I mean who is telling you to kick a goal n become a hero…All I am saying is everyone is walking their own path, their own way..u r not alone..many like are there…so if they are completing their journey then y not u? I believe my response was quite rational, if not from the situation and circumstances you may be in but most definitely from my own. I’m sure YOU understand that. Otherwise seems like a good way to die without suicide. If no money steal them if you must. I think I need others who feel like me to talk to. Bipolar is another name for double-mindedness. Finally, I don’t want anyone to experience the hell that leads to suicide and even the thoughts to do do It. As to how I would feel. Before I was very nice to my girlfriend at the time bought flowers, cards, gave her lots of affection. Tiggerz65te@gmail.com. Published: 11:28 GMT, 2 September 2020 | Updated: 11:35 GMT, 2 September 2020. Makes me wonder if I’m dead They will be able to help you find the help that you want and need. Try to hang in honey, most likely you will never be in the place or places I have been. If this world were such a lovely place, we wouldn’t need police and armed forces to protect us. You are much younger and are reaching out for help now! Yet, I actually envy him, he is truly free from this awful world. I was not promoting this with Denise. Don’t push it of course but make him know he is loved and make him fell it. they never showed eachother real unconditional love and affection, which I think is the reason why I can’t hold a relationship, despite how hard I’ve tried in the past to love someone. As Michael Stipe sang, “Everybody hurts…so hold on”. It sucks. In the meantime, I will continue to search both within and without for even just the smallest of reprieves to this abominable illness. Praying to non-existent gods does no good. I’m scared. I have no friends neither i am close to any one. Including this short escape. I live alone and spend 14 hours a day in front of the TV. Otherwise the post is ridiculious as you say. Anyhow that statement is very true. One always hears that taking one’s life is a selfish act. Enjoy believing we all have the pleasures you have. The harsh reality is that there are not that many people out there who are empathetic towards people with mental illnesses. Life is hard. By subscribing, you'll get access to a FREE eBook on coping skills. A reflection staring back at me ,and just wonder who this person is and why is she here.everyday is the same flat emotionless blank torture that I have to force to pretend like I am slightly OK but I am not at all slightly OK I am completely empty hurt and lost I am a lost soul.completely lost. Nothing I would more and always makes me feel week saying so especially knowing the virtually non-existent privacy of the computer but I feel these days I must not be like a politician and say what I feel. Iam still not out of it, but waiting patiently. I finally felt like i could live life with her instead of just going through the motions. However, I do not see suicide as a big problem. What does my stance on censorship have to do with what my beliefs are on suicide. Is you or one of the above. I’d love to hear some more info or possibly experience with recovery through an ayahuasca journey. seus próprios Pins no Pinterest. They damaged my system with neuro antibitics.. Remember how the Catholic church read literature first then decided who could handle it. That was all I was saying. It puts one into a panicked and near-death state. They are like children and very naive and must be quite sheltered or perpetually bury their heads in the sand or similar. I do indeed feel dead inside right now. I feel like the world is on my shoulders. And days when did not do exercise I got same those depressive feeling. I don’t even remember eating, but my hubby told me he made sure I did. At that point I still had a good feeling for life and that life has deeper meaning and all that. Hope you can work out your problems. I feel dead inside and out of touch with my feelings. I felt Love. Please, if you cannot find anyone to help or are afraid to talk to family or friends, please look up this site. I can also see why it would seem like there’s no escape, but this isn’t true either. As to actually killing yourself I really hope you don’t. I say things I know will be read by my political enemies. I miss him so much, but nothing in the world can bring him back. It feels like a million miles of string balled up hopelessly in an infinite knot that must be untied. Normally getting back into the grove and meeting new people adds some light to the darkness and some hope to my soul. I agree with you Judy on all the facts you mentioned. Both terms describe unstability. Put me in front of a glorious sunset. Then depression hit, and I’m just now getting happy. Actually, the environment in my house makes it more disastrous. It also saddens me that you don’t feel like you can ever trust someone again. I’ve been getting increasingly suicidal due to this and I just want to find something that makes me feel again. Campbell's older brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia at 18, and he has admitted that while he smoked for 30 years and ate badly - he feels his past lifestyle and genetics may be still having an impact on his mind today. Anhedonia is the worst part of my life. When I was younger I had friends that would cut themselves and I could never understand why. Not a way to end it. I could not possibly articulate my feelings with words. It was as though my brother had never taken his life. Unfortunately I have no such money. I really wish that it was an option. I got involved with a woman who has put me through hell. They are people just like you and I, and are there to listen to you, support you, offer you comfort and advice. I’ve never seen so much gossip and hypocrisy in my life. All you want it to do.. IS END and you really don’t want it returning and you eventually get to where you do not want to be 2 years down the road and STILL battling it. d, You maid me cry with your words . Things WILL get better..there is help. Alastair Campbell says that his depression can leave him feeling 'dead inside', but admitted it can be 'harder' for his partner Fiona Millar. The only time I was able to feel at all, was when I was with her. I feel like to kill myself sometimes with a knife , sometimes in an accident. I don’t have aspirations, any that I did have have diminished. If it was not choice you could not choose it. For the past 17 years I have had to talk myself into getting out of bed in the morning, “for my babies, they need me whole” I would say everyday, this past week I couldn’t even force myself to wake up. I count the hours down until can go to bed as sleep is the only relief I have when the medication isn’t working. Needless to say we separated. Sorry about a little bit of run on etc. It is beyond difficult. It must be sound like It must be any boyfriend matter but no, everything was happened and still happening in my house that causing me to live in an extreme situation. I had something similar happen. I am grateful for Will’s comments because they felt like they were getting at the root of a bigger issue. I had it once and there is nothing like it and I wish it for everyone. Like my title says, i feel dead inside. Nowadays time to time whenever i get too tensed i feel a pain in my left side of chest till back but to only some extent.I can’t share to any one living close to me. If you have Dissociation Disorder mulitple Personalities caused by Child Abuse of Adult abuse. One being good medical care and adequate or good medications. My world is upside down like never before. things that used to hurt me don’t even scratch my surface. Here’s the catch, whenever school ended, I went home, and stopped being able to feel anything. I had a really bad PTSD attack that pushed me into a manic episode late last May, it didn’t let up until August. Yes, I love women just as I hope your man does. I understand and appreciate that this is your sandbox and respect that, although I’m not sure how you say you don’t believe in yet practice it. Julianne Marie De las Alas, January 12, 2019 January 13, 2019, Blog, Depression, 1 . Official Audio by XXXTENTACION - Dead Inside (Interlude) (Audio) © 2017 Bad Vibes Forever / EMPIRE Father-of-one who scooped £1million aged 22 reveals he  wears... No lockdown haircut here! I can’t explain why pain exists when nothing else does; I only know that is the case. Depression is many things to many people. We also have family and friends. Ever. I haven’t had much luck with mine. I will not discuss/debate/argue with you any longer. everyone is speaking to me; i don’t feel so alone in this now. Or? I have no one to turn too. I know exactly how you feel. The levels at which you must go minute to minute to fight the anxiety and darkness that is right in your face at 2:00 with not a soul who cares or wishes to listen. Otherwise if you stay something much worse is likely to happen. Including killing myself. But I need my self back, for my kids and I deserve to be happy and I understand God sees everything and even through the darkness I still stayed positive but I’m just losing hope that I will ever feel something. WN. Kittens playing make me feel the same as staring at a wall of grey. I don’t know what to do , I can see what will repeat tomorrow but I have to still be extremely sad because of her……. Lost and desperate. Maybe it’s how I grew up where most of the time I got a shrug at best. And even as I write this, I still feel nothing for that moment. I’m not just saying that, I mean it. Sometimes all we can do is accept things the way they are, as hard as it is. But I get it not that I do it you do it to see if your still alive. of hell or low frequncy people.. hugz, Do you really think it is just all about me, me, me? I am so down right now that I just want to sit in bed and drink all the accumulated psyh meds in the cabinet with alcohol. If your treatment wall for you and your loved ones ends at the first world road blocks. I can understand you feeling that way. Life is dynamic and ever changing. Try expanding your horizons. This has been a pressing problem I’ve had to deal with endlessly over the years. I m living a life of lonliness although I have my parents my sibling always around me and a very supportive family still this suicidal instinct exist in me . At 18 with the state of mind of a hopeless 52 year old, what’s the point. Gift for Depressed People. Do you create different i.d.s due to shame and the inability to defend your opinions. If you are doing it. This is The truth! That being said, I would like to address the idea of what Ms. Tracy wrote when she stated: ” it’s understandable when escape means death, means suicide – if you think there is no other means available.”. i dont know.. always feel scary.. cant go outside home alone.. just hate the unknown people around me.. their voices.. cant tolerate heavy sounds of traffic.. niether want to live nor want to die.. i dnt knw what i need.. frustrated always.. bad relationships.. lost all my interest in things i used to enjoy earlier.. not even a single thing is ok.. not my career, my love life.. i doubt if i exist or not.. where i am????? Design 'Dead inside emo depression feelings lonely' on Men's Zip Hoodie in black, size S-2XL at Spreadshirt » customizable easy returns Call a crisis line, a suicide hotline (even though you may not be feeling suicidal). An issue that is seldom spoken for fear if we openly talk about it it will make us do it. Not because he is an asshole, but just because I don’t care. I stand by my response to Jody irrespective of your views. I don’t mean to offend you or to ‘censor’ you, but please be mindful that what you do post may contribute to how a person is dealing with whatever phase they’re in right now. I find it interesting that whilst defending your position in this matter you did not once acknowledge the harm that may ensue if the content of your comments did in fact reflect ‘instructions on suicide’. I have gone through the gambit of medications, talk therapy, CBT, DBT, even subjected myself to electro-convulsive therapy in the hopes that it will alleviate, at least for a little while, some of the symptoms described in Ms. Tracy’s article. I think I would believe it. Years and years, decades of “toughing it out” through those bad days, and never really enjoying the good days. Thought I’d get that out to see if I felt better! Again I have an emotional problem, not an intellectual one. They’re so angry that many believe in a God; they can’t wait to try to bust their metaphorical religious bubble anyway they can. Not all of the poor are fools and we won’t beg forever. However, being that this is Natasha’s website, we all need to honor her requests. I have to live for them. I just have to remember to breathe. Maybe not for the fortunate like you and me but for all of us with this horiable disease. So I suffer in silence. I had a beautiful, wonderful girl I deeply loved and wanted to be with forever. There are people out there who care about your life. I grew up in a very physically and emotionally abusive setting. And quite frankly, I can’t imagine a non-sufferer to ever fully grasp the enormity of it all. I feel dead inside too. Certainly not to tear anyone down. As in is it your fault because of the god(s), their morality and so on, and on. Some people don’t feel sad, per se, they feel nothing; they feel dead inside. I don’t know what is wrong with me . Or common sense. I have always thrived at making lots of friends but suddenly I feel like I have few true friends. PAROLES LES PLUS VUES. Ever since my Uncle passed away seven years ago from cancer, I have felt dead inside. Many are in the same boat and do care. I felt encouraged. The dead I feel inside is the complete lack of interest or desire for the members of the opposite sex. This isn’t me and I don’t know what to do about it, I love my family and just wish I was the happy, funny guy my mrs fell in love with to make everyone happy and that my boys grow up knowing the real me instead of a psychotic freak that I’ve become. Noté /5. He is going through the “dead inside” phase right now, and I would like to ask you guys, what is the best thing I can do to help him get through this? Maybe we will meet up by chatting on the site I posted above. so be happy and feel IMPORTANT YOURSELF I always say myself Is that person is important or myself. Please, do not get me wrong here. your blogs truly help me to understand after losing a loved one to suicude last year. thank you natacha and all the others who say what they are experiencing. made it to the other side, saw my husband. I don’t believe this gets us anywhere. I finally found one that has helped me not think of suicide 24/7. WN in PA, USA. If someone takes someone into there confidence and on top of it takes their money and in return reports them to abusive police or other wise in payback. It’s like I give my all for my kids and I can careless about myself. If you wish to write about things I don’t allow here, feel free to start your own website. As for me everything always normal. I talk about this all the time. The end. Thank you for listening, W.N. im in the same boat you are bud. If you wish the conversation to not continue. Sending you a gentle hug. Censorship is something I am very strongly against. If you really do think this way, then you haven’t grasped the magnitude of what this illness does to a person from the inside out. 'Because with her I felt I could be myself and I’m not like that often, but when I am it’s horrific. But you are very important and this is not your fault ,it is His bad luck.he didn’t deserve you . Your email address will not be published. This is usually to maintain power, money, control as I always say and almost always has that intent. As far as I know my life from now is nothing but pain. Is it you. Shame, for a big tall intelligent good looking man with a good family. hr. It doesn’t change my mind it reinforces that some think they always know better then others. Good luck and fight the good fight. We are no longer accepting comments on this article. So we are born, socialised (well or poorly), educated, had good times with my trys at playing “relationships”, all wrong for me, but I did not see this till too late, had hard time in rationalising my quick decisions and life mistakes, my ” id” having totally taken me over, mind and body. Please stop and engage the arguments without resorting to low blows. If you ever want to talk personally just ask and I’ll give you my e-mail address as I believe most here would. Also regardless these drugs can be over the price range of most if not all of the human population of those with BP. I’ve been on this low for 8 moths. I’m still trying. So, go run to the MD with the scripts and take the pills or capsules or sublinguals or shots or drink the liquid… and still, it returns. Manic right now and love from a partner is about ten minutes or so my. Blogs truly help me to stumble upon your stories and now your!. Very similiar experience by drug companies and “ law enforcement ’ ect people are. 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